Dirty Deeds... done dirt cheap....
... This is not a blog that I'm thrilled about writing, but it needs to be said... and no, it's not about the infamous song of that same name.
I'm talking about those little things that you see somewhere that don't look quite right when you look at them sideways or let your mind roll them around for a few minutes (or hours).
Recently a friend of mine wrote a blog entry
about her experiences meeting another stitcher years ago and how... unsettling and strange that meeting was. Especially when the friend in question felt like her religion was coming under attack during the get-together, and then was flabbergasted later to find that this person was also of the same religion.
The purpose of writing this was to get it all off her chest, to stop holding it all in, and to vent. After all, if one can't vent in their blog, where can they? We all know you can't vent on a BB, because your words *will* be thrown back at you no matter the amount of time or reflection that has passed, and I suppose a blog is exactly the same too. Especially considering I've had words here thrown back at me elsewhere - but I don't make that statement with any malice, and I digress...
The author of the blog (my friend) was distressed to see further behavior that wasn't in accordance with the beliefs of the religion, and to see other friends be admonished and confronted. One was told to remember her religion (not in those words) and I was asked why I was even there in the first place when I'd said elsewhere that I'd decided to leave that board. So, she got fed up and posted her blog. You'd think that since my friend's issues were posted for all the world to see that the person in question would comment on the blog, or contact my friend (at the very least) to discuss it, right?
Wrong. Someone else was pointed in that direction by the person who was the focus of the blog in question and commented on it that while they didn't read the blog entry (I assume that's what they meant, but it was rather unclear in the comment), they found the blog distasteful and that the person is really a nice person. While I don't know the commenter well at all, I'm not going to point fingers that she was told (or encouraged) to post the comment by the person whom the blog was about. I'm sure that's not the case.
But when my mind started leading me down that path before I dismissed it (rightfully so, I hope) it does remind me about when I had someone post an anonymous comment against my blog around Mother's Day telling me how despicably ungrateful I was about my Mom's Day and that I should treasure my children. As if I don't. I learned later, as I had suspected, that this entry was recited to someone else to post against my blog anonymously - so that traceability could never occur (mistakenly, of course, I knew too much and can trace lots of things).
It was a dirty deed that someone wanted done... and I'm sure it was done dirt cheap. I don't know what the price that was paid to the person commenting was, but I know what I paid for it - angst, anger, and outright distrust of the person that can never be resolved.
I don't understand how someone could exhibit such power and influence to convince someone to say something without knowing all the facts. I know that's the case in my situation since I'd never met the person who posted against my blog but knew enough details about her to know who she was (and who she was to the person who really wanted to make that statement). I don't know that that's the case in my friend's blog, but from the content of the comment I have to assume that both sides/viewpoints aren't known either.
The same thing goes for the challenge as to what I was doing posting on that board again after a comment from someplace else was used. I felt that wasn't fair considering that the topic was not about who had the right to post, but about a certain poster and her methods for presenting/participating in a debate. Considering that I felt that I had something really valuable to say with regards to the conversation at hand, I was ok with going back on my comment to leave that particular board.
Now I regret entering that conversation - completely and absolutely. It's clear to me that the challenge was really an attempt to put me in my place and to tell me to get lost. Without actually saying it outright. Throw my words back at me, despite the value of what I had to say - which apparently, I assume, must not be all that valuable to the individual in question. At least not according to the haughty way it seemed to be posed to me. Of course one can easily misconstrue tone in the written word, but somehow I don't think that I did.
So, that's one less BB that I'll be visiting, that's for sure. It was a dirty deed - it was definitely done dirt cheap. Talk *is* cheap they've always said, and I guess it truly held it's weight in this case.
The same thing goes for hate mail. How much dirtier a deed can you get than sending someone hate mail for any reason?
There's someone that I'm friendly with who received a piece of hate mail over posting a picture of her children in a thread that was specifically for showing off pics of the kids. She was the only one (that I am aware of) that received a piece of correspondence that termed her a show-off and that she's conceited. At least that's what I'm gathering from what she said in a post after removing the kids photos. I don't have the text of the hate mail, nor do I know who it's from, so don't ask me for the details.
I can't understand that - why didn't anyone else get mail like that about their kids? It's certainly clear that this was targeted at this particular person, and that's just rude and mean. What does one hope to gain by doing this? They get their jollies off, yes, and they make someone hurt. They want them to go away, get lost, make it known that the value of the person and what they are proud of is completely naught. Another dirty deed... done dirt cheap.
You know, I really wonder what would happen if people started getting hate mails about their stitching. If you were truly passionate about Mirabilia designs and then started getting anonymous mail telling you that you were stupid for stitching them. Or what about wasting so much time on a fairy tale dragon that Teresa Wentzler put together? Or because, for some unbeknownst reason to all, you enjoy lime-green aida? (Sorry, couldn't resist since I once got hate mail telling me I was stupid for trying to sell black aida cloth - and no, that's long gone, so don't email offering to take it off my hands.) All of it's a nasty business, and people really should get a clue, or a Clue-By-Four, whapped upside their brainless heads. All of these types of things the comments, the challenges, the admonishments, the hate mails they are dirty deeds done with dirty hands...
....and it's the behavior that's dirt cheap.