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Thursday, February 15, 2007
Irony is a Cruel Mistress...
...especially when she decides to show up on Valentine's Day. Oh yes, V-Day.

I suspect the gods of irony were in collusion with stupid Cupid and decided that they didn't like my discussion of love yesterday. I don't see why not because obsession should fit right in with Cupid (who helped stalkers) and irony (who victimizes everyone).

Well, not all the irony happened to me yesterday. Yesterday I went to lunch with a co-worker who recently found out she's pregnant. She's rather happy about it, as she should be, but is discovering strange things happening. Strange things always happen when you're pregnant, and she's blaming her recent carnivorous streak on the idea that she is going to have a boy. I'm not throwing any weight behind that because I ate more meat and enjoyed it more while I was pregnant and I have two girls.

Anyway, yesterday at lunch she drinks a root beer, and then we wander off to a corner store to find her a Twix bar so she can indulge a craving she's been having. We don't find it and she comes back with a Crunch instead. After breaking off two bites she realizes that the chocolate tastes funny and offers it to me. I raise an eyebrow at the comment that the chocolate may have 'bloomed' and wonder aloud why she's offering it to me. After all, I'm a chocolate snob most of the time.

Well, she's figured that it's not bloomed very much but it's enough to set her off. I check and find the bar looks just fine, but I don't taste it. She's figured out that maybe her taste buds have gone haywire and that chocolate is the victim. That's when I tell her to take an M&M out of my jar and find out if they still taste the same.

She does. It doesn't. And this depresses her quickly until, in the course of conversation, we figure out that it's really *sugar* that doesn't taste right for her anymore. So while the irony and unfortunate situation of discovering that sugar doesn't taste right anymore is bad enough, discovering this little fact on Valentine's Day makes it that much worse.

Now, you notice, I didn't taste the chocolate she offered. That was because someone *cough*DH*cough* had the bright idea of scheduling the family dentist appointment on Valentine's Day. I knew that this would not end well. There's no way that it *could*, right?


So I go to the dentist and hope for the best. No cavities. This is normal. I don't expect them, and I take good care of my teeth and I don't get cavities. The rest of the family passes with flying colors too. But unfortunately, as a result of not flossing as much this round as I normally do (and I could always floss a little more than I actually do) I have a little bit of excess buildup and it needs to be removed.

So the cleaning goes into high gear. My hygienist is a rather nice lady and she does a good and thorough job of cleaning. Unfortunately for me, she slipped with the hook and caused a little pain in the space behind my two middle upper teeth. I'm sure you know what that feels like, so I'll let you imagine that sharp stabbing pain for a moment.

Ok, moment's over. That spot is still a little inflamed this morning. What's worse is last night my teeth felt "loose". And my gums were rather sensitive. This is normal after a cleaning, but not to this extent. It usually goes away after a couple of hours. We'd wandered off for Jamba Juice after the cleaning (that took a while to drink since it was pretty cold and cold hurt), and I'd asked DH if this is what was all for dinner. He assured me that no, this was just going to be a snack. He didn't know what was for dinner, but Jamba Juice wasn't it.

Where's the irony, you ask? Well, not only did I not eat chocolate yesterday, figuring I'd get some after dinner, I couldn't eat anything. DD#2 made macaroni and cheese for dinner, and I wanted none of it. I knew I couldn't chew the asparagus either, so I just wandered off with about two inches of apple juice in my glass so that it could get to room temperature and I could drink it. What hurt worse? I couldn't have any of my Valentine's candy, because there was no way I was going to consider chewing Jelly Belly's the way my teeth hurt.

Yes, I got a nice big bag of jellybeans ("Hello Irony, I'm WG, nice to meet you"). I think DH realized when he gave them to me before the appointment that this was not such a good idea. I think I'll be able to eat them in a couple of days. Maybe...

...yes, my teeth and gums are still sensitive this morning.